February 13, 2008
Know thyself…
Dateline New Year’s Day, Athens: Jen and I were stopped at a crosswalk and I had my map open, checking to make sure we were going in the right direction to see the changing of the guard at the Greek parliament. An older, distinguished-looking gentleman sporting a fedora and a nicely cut suit approached us. In one hand he held a fine leather briefcase, in the other a cake with “2008” iced on top.
He asked if we “lovely ladies” needed help. Upon hearing our destination, he invited us to walk with him since he was headed that way. I said, how could we refuse, he had cake. He chuckled and responded “Yes, Athens is a city of cake and kisses. Have you been kissed here yet?” Jen looked like she was ready to run; but I laughed and said, “I haven’t been so lucky, though I still have 24 hours before we leave.”
Turns out, the gentleman is a professor at the University of Athens. He told us the tale of how in Ancient Greece, wisdom-seekers were advised to “Know Thyself” before asking the Oracle at Delphi questions about their future. Strangely, it was the third time I’d heard the phrase in as many days and it’s stuck with me ever since.
Do I know myself? I have a decent idea of what makes me tick and what ticks me off. Am I myself? That’s the interesting question. When I was overweight, I hid my feelings even if I couldn’t hide my body. Even now, 100+ lbs lighter later, I still find it really hard to put my self out there. I guess I thought it would get easier.
As my friend Magnolia likes to say, “Can’t never could.” I started my year off with a stranger’s story to “Know Thyself”; but I think my direction for 2008 is to have the confidence to “Be Thyself.” Some cake and kisses would be nice too.
January 29, 2008
This idea's got legs...
Trek Fit for Women Demo chick, Tori, is a genius! Last Thursday, she posted a comment on my blog that her Valentine’s Day plan is to bike an indoor century, which should take about 6 hours. If you haven’t checked out the thread yet, here’s why it’s so perfect for everyone like me who HATES Feb 14 with a passion. Says Tori, “Just think Friday morning when people snidely ask ‘so, what did you do for V-Day? You can say ‘rode my bike 100 miles...you?’ ”
Don’t you love it? Then, Jen Polo added in the married perspective –- you mean you aren’t all swooning over each other? And, Trek Demo chick, Ross, is in to it. (There’s also an interesting sideline about Project Runway if you’re interested.) Then, commenter Sue talked about a 400-mile by V-Day fudge goal she’s got going with her friends called “Shoot Cupid.”
I think we’re on to something! So, I propose that we initiate a First Annual anti V-Day indoor cycling challenge. First off, we need a sweet name for the challenge that snark-ily captures the essence of our ride. Post your suggestions as a comment by noon on Friday, Feb. 1. Then, we’ll vote.
Second, instead of measuring our soon-to-be-named ride in miles, let’s do something different. Regular century rides usually offer different distances: half-metric = 35 miles; metric century = 62 miles; and English century = 100 miles. I thought we could measure in time. Maybe for the soon-to-be-named Indoor Cycling Challenge, our distances could be:
> 1 episode of Sex and the City or guy-equivalent TV show
> 1 John Cusack movie or guy equivalent where things blow up
> Pride & Prejudice – the 5-hour BBC/A&E miniseries with Colin Firth – or guy equivalent miniseries
> Project Runway marathon (!) or guy-equivalent such as Ultimate Fighting Championship
> ______ your own guilty pleasure show or movie
Are you in?
January 24, 2008
Lackadaisical love life…
Some heartless creature brought iced, heart-shaped cookies to work this morning and anonymously left them in the kitchen for all to “enjoy.” Not only is it bad enough to be tortured by such sugary goodness, it’s also a nauseating reminder that the worst day of the year is only three weeks away. I LOATHE VALENTINE’S DAY!
People always blame Hallmark for the V-Day hype. I disagree. I think it’s an evil consortium between Blockbuster, Pizza Hut and Ben & Jerry’s to make single women without dates—who are sitting at home; watching movies where Matthew McConaghy takes his shirt off (all of them); and ordering take-out because good luck getting in to a restaurant and who would want to watch all those lovey-doveys anyway—feel even worse. Someone give me a pint and a spoon. My love life is lacking and e-Harmony ads give me the creeps.
The problem is, I haven’t really been trying to remedy the situation lately. Before the holidays, I had traded emails with a guy “J.” He seemed nice enough, said he was in to fitness and running. We decided to chat on the phone. I asked him if he ran for fun or if he was training for something. “J” confessed that he hadn’t ran in close to a year; but, if we went out for a run together, he’d still have to beat me to the finish. Nice talking to you macho man. Though part of me wanted to challenge him to see who was hacking up vital internal organs at mile 5. His woo-ing needs work. Who am I to talk though? My half-hearted efforts haven’t gotten me too far either. At least I didn’t eat a cookie.
December 10, 2007
Yodel-ay-heeee-whoooo...
It’s too funny, the reactions that I’ve been getting to my story about The Baron. I was at my friend Joe H’s holiday party on Saturday night and the topic of dating came up. Russ and Wayne start telling the group about the debacle. They were witnesses of a sort since I called them when I escaped to the ladies room during dinner. Of course, they were dying laughing, like I was.
Fast forward to the party, my tragic tale is revealed. The women there were like, “He brought an old man on your first date?” Yep. “Was it his Grandpa?” Nope. “What was he thinking?” I have no clue. “What did you do?” Eagerly anticipate the next freaky thing to happen. “That beats my worst date ever.” Why thank you, thank you very much.
I’ve also gotten a slew of emails including one from my bro-in-law’s Mom, Pat (who I absolutely adore) that she got a kick out of reading the story. I emailed her back with a little nugget that I didn’t share the first time around. Enjoy!
We're at the German restaurant, eating, and I’d already come to the conclusion that the approaching 80-year-old Baron was way more interesting than my date. He starts to tell me about his lady friend who is a MUCH younger woman. Though I know it’s impolite, I have to ask him how much younger. With a twinkle is his eye, The Baron reveals that she’s in her 60s. Yodel-ay-hee-whoooo-boy!!!
I was kind of relieved actually because if he had said she was around my age, I was seriously going to have to reconsider this whole dating thing or consider getting Botox. Pat’s response, “I like the sound of being in your 60s making you a much younger woman!” I like the idea of being someone’s “lady friend” some day. I wonder if Match.com has a category for gentlemen callers?
December 4, 2007
A date with the baron...
Am I too old for a chaperone? I get a Match.com message from “R”. We email back and forth, talk on the phone a few times and decide to meet. R seems nice, about my age, likes to run, is an art director by day and a weekend sculptor. He also says he’s a vegetarian, which is fine by me as long as you’re not going to stab me with a spork if I order a turkey sandwich.
We both like German food and R mentions a restaurant in Maryland that a friend highly recommends. We make plans to meet there after work on a Friday –- taking separate cars. Date night arrives and I mapquest directions. It’s at least a 90-minute drive, closer to 2 hours in rush hour traffic. This better be good.
I get to the restaurant a few minutes early. It’s cozy and very Bavarian looking. My cell rings and R tells me he’s running late because he had to pick up his friend. Scenario (A) that’s running through my mind is that R had to pick up and drop off said friend along the way. Scenario (B) is what walked through the door.
Said friend -- I don’t know what his real name is, but he’s called The Baron. The Baron is 77 years old, robust, with white hair, rosy cheeks and small round glasses. He’s sporting a German-style leather vest and a green Alpine wool hat with a small feather. All he needed were lederhosen to complete the ensemble.
R had mentioned his friend, The Baron, during one of our phone calls. The restaurant is The Baron’s favorite. The Baron is the one who drove them to the restaurant. Scenario (C), The Baron and R came together; but, he’s joining other people for dinner. Scenario (D) is what really happened.
The host seats R, The Baron and me at a small table. I order goulash and a large beer. The Baron picks the special and R orders wiener schnitzel. I ask R if he knows that schnitzel is made of pork. He says yes. I say, “Oh, I thought you were a vegetarian.” He replies, “Only on the weekends.” I’m gonna need another beer.
The evening rolls on and it dawns on me that I’m a third wheel on my own first date. I excuse myself to the ladies room. Scenario (E) make an escape through the window. Scenario (F) laugh out loud and see what else could possibly happen.
I walk back to the table and R says to me, “You have a very nice body. I can tell because I am a sculptor.” He says this IN FRONT OF The Baron. I’m thinking, keep it to yourself there meat-eater. Shortly thereafter, our chaperone signals his need to head home. I guess it’s past his bed time. The Baron and my date walk me to my car. We all shake hands. Auf wiedersehen forever. The goulash was excellent though.
Still single, still willing to mingle.
October 31, 2007
Hunt for a hunk...
This single’s stuff has homework. I’ve been trying to do one thing a week in my ongoing hunt for a hunk. Hunk, meaning a nice, funny guy who’s happy with what he does in life, bonus points if he likes riding too. Some days, the only way I think I'll find him is if I happen to fall on him on the bike path. I haven't counted that method out yet; but, I'd prefer something a little less painful.
To get back to my original point, I checked out some Internet dating sites this past weekend. Who hasn’t heard stories of the friend of a friend’s cousin’s roommate’s sister who met her soul mate online and now they'll be together forever (they’re registered at Pottery Barn).
Completing your dating profile is like writing the next great American novel. Between taking "personality" "perfect match" quizzes and answering a million essay questions about who you're looking for, I wasn’t even sure who I was by the end. Here’s a sample… Thunderstorms: turn on or turn off? Tattoos: turn on or turn off? Skinny dipping: turn on or turn off? How about, skinny dipping: turn around and get the heck out of here if you think I’m stripping down to my birthday suit in public. Jeez. This is supposed to be fun, right?
P.S. It was pretty incredible on Sunday’s ride when we met up with the other DC cycling club. The whirring noise from our 100+ bikes sounded like a swarm of happy grasshoppers. I was too busy pushing to keep pace with the group to see if any of the guys were worth falling on -- just kidding :) I kept up just fine.
October 19, 2007
Goldilocks in dating hell...
First off, I owe you all an apology for so blithely exclaiming in an earlier blog that I will now paraphrase -– hey everybody, I am now “putting myself out there” and of course eligible bachelors will flock to me like blue hairs to an early bird special… like seagulls to a boardwalk french fry… like ants to a disco picnic*…
Proclaiming that I’m in the dating market is not the same thing as actually getting dates. There has been no flocking, no flirting, no nothing. So, I decided to take action by signing up for “An Evening of Four Minute Dating for Travel Lovers.” Perfect, right –- already a shared interest.
I felt like Goldilocks in dating hell. A couple were too old, some way too young, a few were dripping with crazy, and one was afraid to fly. I never knew four minutes could last so long. In truth, there were guys there that I thought, hmmm, maybe. But alas, no date connections were made that night. It was good practice though and I give myself points for doing it.
Some day, I believe it, this Goldilocks will find her just right.
*I don’t know what a disco picnic is, but it sounded funny to me. Also, no offense if you have blue hair and like early bird specials.
September 21, 2007
Lame game...
Ask any one of my friends and they’ll tell you, my dating game is lame! When I try to flirt, it looks like I’m about to have an attack. I get tongue-tied and can’t think of anything to say. I get overwhelmed at parties and work events and hide out in the ladies room to avoid mingling. (In truth though, I allow myself to go once an hour for a few minutes to regroup. I don’t stay in there the whole night as much I want to sometimes.)
It’s tragic really.
But, ever-conscious of my desire to ramp up my single’s speed from lame-o to dyn-o-mite, I actually talked to a goodlooking fellow not too long ago. I had just finished up a swim workout and was getting ready to leave when I crossed paths with a guy coming in to the pool area. He initiated a conversation and we chatted briefly about the water temp and swimming and stuff, then parted ways. Well, I’m giving myself a mental high five because not only did I open my mouth and speak, I did it wearing a bathing suit. Tell me that’s not progress.
With a little sass in my step, I entered the locker room, passing by a mirror. I did a double-take. Horrors!!!! I had mad hair horns on my head from pulling off my swim cap and my allegedly waterproof mascara had made a trip south to settle not so attractively below my eyes. Aggggghhhhhhh!
Still tragic, still trying.
September 8, 2007
Putting it out there...
My how times have changed. When I was a teenager, if you “put out,” you were considered sleezy. Nowadays, all my single friends are chanting the same refrain, “I’ve got to put myself out there.” What happened that we’ve got to put it out there in order to get some (dates, I mean)? And, what are we supposed to be putting out anyway?? I wish I knew.
People have asked me, “Why don’t you have a boyfriend?” Oh, complicated question… or maybe not. I’ve never been a dater. My weight issues got in the way, or at least they were a convenient excuse for me to avoid potential rejection (ah ha!). I never thought I was attractive, so why would some guy want to go out with me. And you’re probably yelling at the computer screen right now, “Laura, looks do not equal love.” I hear you. But, if you don’t love yourself, how can you expect someone else to fill that void (ah ha! the sequel).
It spins back to self-esteem and I’m training myself in that area as much as I train my physical self on my bike or in the gym. So, I’m going to come up with a plan and start putting it (me) out there in the dating world and take my single’s speed from zero to 60. Stay tuned…
August 8, 2007
Pleased to Meet You!
Let me be the first to welcome you to the brand spanking new Trek Women Who Ride community!
We’re women who grab life by the handlebars. We’re women who saddle up every chance we get in our busy schedules. Speed doesn’t matter, neither does distance or the bike whether it’s a road, mountain, fitness or leisure. The only thing that really counts is that cycling makes us feel good about ourselves.
Hi, my name is Laura. I’m 38, single, never been married, no kids, and I live in Washington, DC. My sister, Jen, and I share a rowhouse on Capitol Hill with our quirky cat, Uncao. I do communications/public relations specializing in social issues for a public health consulting firm. When I’m not out on the trails biking, I’m training for the Accenture Chicago Triathlon (my first one) and planning my next vacation abroad (I go to Europe 2-3 times a year).
Oh, and I lost a person. Yep, I lost more than 130 pounds!!!!
I made the decision to change my life in August 2005. By exercising and eating right, I reached my goal weight this past March, 19 months later. Just like a good bike ride, there were many ups and downs along the way; but, I never veered from the course. I wanted more than anything to transform myself into a strong, healthy, and fit woman and I did it. Now, the challenge is to maintain my weight loss and explore all those other scary life areas (aggh, dating).
I hope you enjoy my blog. I imagine we’ll talk about all kinds of things like taking off the lbs, training, travel, cool Trek stuff, tasty recipes and more. Along the way, please feel free to share your thoughts too.
To me, Trek means journey, and this is going to be quite a trip. Let’s take it together!!
