Trek Women
November 13, 2008

Pocketful of rotten eggs…

Eggs You know, I’m a law-abiding citizen. I pay my taxes. I don’t steal other people’s stuff (especially scooters). I park in legal spots (not in front of fire hydrants like those lazy idiots at our local Starbucks). And, I follow traffic rules - something that drivers and metrobuses in DC apparently feel don’t apply to them.

I’m gonna have to get Botox cause of commuting with a dirty look on my face. Because at least once a day some [insert bad word] attempts to run me over by failing to abide by the law. And it doesn’t seem to matter whether I ride my bike or walk.

This morning I hoofed it because I have an event to go to tonight. I am in the pedestrian crosswalk like a good girl and this woman in a station wagon zooms through the intersection, and she saw me there too, even though by DC law she is required to stop. Of course, I screamed at her (not that she heard me) and gestured like a wildwoman.

So then, I’m walking down the street, pissed off, and I wished I had a pocketful of rotten eggs that I could just chuck at her and all those other people who won’t wait the 10 seconds it takes for me to walk across the street.

Can you imagine it? It wouldn’t damage her car, but it sure would scare the crap out of her. But then, I remembered my penchant for tripping and falling down and then I’d have a pocketful of smashed rotten eggs and that would really stink. Plus, it wouldn’t be safe, blah blah blah. Still it was a nice fantasy.


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